Disgrace-Face #3: Spare Me Your Phony Christians

You made Jesus cry.

You made Jesus cry.

I don’t often discuss religion on this blog for a simple reason. It’s the same reason I don’t attack a certain band’s musical ability. In the immortal words of Jack Black, “just a matter of opinion.” You can try to argue your reasoning as to why anything K-pop is better than Metallica, but you’ll never win anyone over. People like their music and their gods for their own special reasons. I’m really happy when I meet a religious person who takes it upon themselves to not discuss their religion with me, as I think a religion is an understanding between a person and their idea of a higher being or cause, and it’s silly to try to make other people see it your way just so you can feel more secure that your way is, in fact, the correct way. I’ll admit that I don’t know as much of the other religions as I do of Christianity, as I was raised Christian. I would even argue that I learned some serious lessons about who I want to be as a person, the most important lesson being to treat other people the way you wish to be treated.

Let’s take that last one in for a second, shall we? Why is it that whenever I have conversations with people who claim to be the most devout and respectful Christians they spew nothing but hate for anyone who doesn’t follow their path? Imagine, if you will, Jesus calling a group of people a “bunch of faggots” and explaining that they’re going to burn in hell because God’s plan was for them to be homosexual. When people started acting the way these hot-headed morons do, Jesus told them not to judge other people unless they themselves were completely without sin. You’ll note that in that particular story, none of the people present were stupid enough to think that they were without sin. They actually listened to what Jesus said and took it to heart. Not so with your current, big swinging dick Christians who can’t wait to tell you why you’re going to hell and pretend that they’re concerned for you when they’re really experiencing some kind of sadistic delight at the torment of others.

Did you know that God is punishing anyone with an IQ over 6 who knows how to read? I love the concept that supposedly everything on earth that happens is part of God’s Plan, and yet these so called Christians get extremely upset over the idea that people are somehow acting outside of God’s plan. Jesus walked around and told people to love one another and forgive people, to turn the other cheek, didn’t he? I don’t see a lot of Other Cheeks In A Turning Position, to be honest with you. I see a lot of stones cast and fingers pointed. If you try to find yourself in the bible, please note that you’re the problem. You’re the people Christ had to talk to and tell to smarten up. How can you read the same book that I did and turn it into a hate passion? It’s the exact opposite of the message that is clearly printed for all to read.

You may have your obscure quotes taken out of context, but what I have is the same message that continually gets hammered home and which, for some reason, so many others miss. The point was never to worship and feel like you were better than other people. The purpose was to enrich the lives of those around you and to work together towards acceptance and understanding. To imply that six month old children in the Philippines are being punished currently for their stance on Catholicism, homosexuality or prostitution makes you sound like a complete fucking moron. Can you really imagine yourself sitting down with Jesus and explaining that blog to him? Do you honestly believe that he wouldn’t punch you in the mouth before you even got halfway through? I mean, the idea of Jesus punching someone in the mouth seems against His character, so why is it okay for people to walk around and verbally do it in His name?

The shortest passage in the King James Bible is actually my favourite. As the shortest, it’s the one that bears the least chance of the message being perverted or corrupted over the years. It’s the one that applies most for our current situation. I’m referring, of course, to, “Jesus wept.” I’m pretty sure that’s just what’s happening right now. All of the hatred and stupidity and violence that are being perpetrated right now in Jesus’ name, what else could He do? What would you do if the simple, easy to understand message that you constantly repeated was warped and perverted into what walks as a religion today. Please understand that I’m not talking about all Christians when I write this. There are a great many I know who keep their religion to themselves and actually got the message. When you share the teachings of Christ you’re supposed to do it in a positive way. You’re not supposed to tell people they’re going to go to hell if they don’t listen to you. Your Glass Is Half Empty recruiting style makes your religion look like a hate club. Why don’t you put on immaculate white robes and pointy white hoods while you’re at it, because that’s about how sophisticated you look when you write horseshit like that. You’re just a loser using mass tragedies to make yourself feel better about things you’re powerless to change in the world, and you sound like a petulant four year old stomping around a supermarket because his mother wouldn’t buy him a pack of bubble gum.

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